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HLM Conversations

August 17, 2013

So my HLM lives in London, which means that for the most part, we talk over Facebook messaging.  (Ever wonder why I’m logged on ALL the time?  I don’t want to miss a pop up message, it’s hard enough with the time difference).  These conversations usually end up hilarious, inappropriate, and probably fueled by wine most of the time.  Way better thing to put in a blog for your viewing pleasures?  So below are completely unaltered (with exception of quotations) snippets of the word vomit that comes out of our mouths.  Enjoy 🙂

 

“Emma Stone could be my spirit animal.”

“I would like you to buy me a tarsier.  His name would be Tito, and I would put him in tiny outfits.” Response:  “Oh my, I think he will need lederhosen. “

“So the guy responded back with logo options and half of them looked like the squirrel was shitting on the company name. wtf”

“I drank too much last night it’s like I swallowed a moth up in this bitch (this bitch would be my mouth).”

“Side note, an old Irish man asked me if I would come in his limo to limerick with him tonight while slurring his words.”

“So, what does that mean?  We need to go back to grunting?”

“I think my internet is being a random bag of dicks.”

It all sounds like hell. and the only way I will be able to make it through motherhood is with an IV of wine.”

“Alright well time for me to workout.  Again I would rather shiv myself with a grapefruit spoon than do this.”

“This is so inappropriate but tall Asians freak me out”

“Also, I’ve never felt the need to shit myself while running.”

 

Pretty sure this will become a pretty regular thing….can you believe I pulled all these quotes from just the last week?  Have any fun recent quotes from classy conversations with your friends?

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From → Daily Rambles

2 Comments
  1. “And its got a clear lid. Now we can watch the cats take dumps!” Me to you sister after buying a new litter box. I’ve been spending too much time with her lol.

    • Laura has always had an unusual appreciation for a good dump….so you guys are a perfect match.

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