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Twerking

September 7, 2013

If you clicked on this expecting to see a video of me twerking….then you’re already drunk.  Unlike the chick that sets herself on fire (you know the one, it’s all over the internet today), I’m not crazy enough to film that.  Also, I just don’t bust out that level of gymnastics in my quest to look ‘sexy’.  In case you were under a rock today, here is the video.

I’m going to go ahead and bypass most of the twerking part.  Or the fact that she looks like a cheerleader and will likely never ‘twerk’ in a club setting or do anything else supposedly edgy or urban in her whole life.  We all know there’s enough Mileys, and people dedicated to talking about them, without me chiming in.  No, what I want to focus on takes us all back to being about five years old or so.  HOW DID THIS BITCH FORGET TO STOP, DROP, AND ROLL???

Seriously.  Break this video down.  We have a coffee table COVERED in candles…which makes no sense right off the bat because there appears to be sunlight streaming through a window.  Already weird.  Now you’ve made sure to set up the camera to capture your most alluring angle, which happens to be at the unlocked front door.  Clearly, you have roommates.  Strike two.  Then, just to add insult to injury: “oh snap, I’m on fire!  Quick, I better get on the extremely flammable couch.”  Ugh.  Strike three.

There’s really only two options here: either she’s giving cheerleaders everywhere a bad name by being as dumb as this video proves….or this was a legit attempt at 15 minutes of fame that went a little wrong.  I’m going with the latter.  I guess we’ll all find out when she shows up on Tosh.0 for her redemption.

That’s it.  I’m done being snarky…it’s Friday.  I need a drink.  What’s everyone else doing this weekend?  Also, do you have a twerking video?  If so, please send it to me (preferably only if it doesn’t have fire involved…I don’t want to promote that kind of nonsense.)  But I would love a good laugh.

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From → Daily Rambles

2 Comments
  1. I laughed so hard at this post. Your sister feels the need to make fun of Miley and twerk on everything. She even did it at the IRS building. And while twerking she sings the Tom Green My Bum song. It’s quite entertaining though I’ve never actually filmed it. I do have a picture that she’s forbidden me to post though.

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